One man's exploration in finding himself and his search for light, beauty, desire and art.
Monday, May 23, 2011
A Day of Creation
I woke up this morning and opened my lap top to see it filled with so many birthday greetings. I have taken the entire day off just to have some fun, which will hopefully be simpler than yesterday. Today I just want to focus on things I am passionate about, mostly photography. I have planned two, possibly three photos sessions today. To me this is the perfect day to create interesting images. I have a lot going on in my head that I now need to explore. And it’s not like it’s actually work today, because it’s going to be a day of hanging with people I really want to spend time with and explore. I can't think of any better way than to celebrate the day of my creation by doing something creative. The refrigerator is filled with food to last me a week, an array of amazing tasting vittles so I really don’t have to go out today. The light is so beautiful in the studio this morning. Everything feels renewed after the rain last night and the foliage radiantly healthy and vibrant, which creates an extraordinary glow off their leaves filling the studio space. It somehow feels the strain and tension in my back, neck and shoulders from the past couple of weeks has been lifted; perhaps now that the party and all is behind me. The entire north facing ceiling of my bedroom is filled with big open skylights. Yesterday I awoke with trepidation looking up as I awoke. This morning I saw glory in the wafting clouds. Something has definitely changed. I will look to the heavens differently now, with less fear. I could barely sleep the night before, because I kept waking and hoping the weather would derail my plan, my head filled with such anxious dreams of falling, but last night I slept so incredibly well. Have I changed so much from such an experience? Perhaps it is the cumulative progression of the past couple of days that mark my passage. Today I don’t feel older, but actually more youthful than before. I have always marveled at how I have retained a youthful quality about me, for many years feeling like Dorian Gray. My hair has not begun to gray, nor recede, nor thin; my body is flexible and in relatively good shape, and my stamina seems robust. Yes the creases are beginning to creep into my face, but I have earned them. I have begun to take on those distinguished looking characteristics I so admired in my grandfather during my youth. My body, my mind and my spirit are always in motion, I think it’s what keeps me in shape. It is time for a new self portrait this week, so I can really take a look at what I have become.